Week 1 in retrospect

I've made it through my first week. If you remember, I was going to work really hard for 12 weeks (since my goal deadline is coming up fast - and I will be ready).

I suppose it's been about a month and a half since I decided to go as clean as possible with my diet. So far, I am absolutely AMAZED at how well I've done. And this past week, I decided to give up bread and cheese, as well as give up eating anything after dinner (or nothing past 7pm). This is only temporary. I'm going to cycle it every 2 weeks, see how it goes. It's a constant experiment.

The funny thing is, I notice myself feeling less hungry. To the point where when it's snack time I'm not starving and can get by on a handful of nuts without wanting to go postal. Not to mention that my belly is less puffy.

Have drank my veggies every morning. I really like that. I don't have to feel bad about not getting my veggies in every day. I do need to buy a better food processor at some point though.

I feel like my diet has been more successful than my workout strategy. I'm going to fine tune that today so I can head into week 2 with a solid plan in place that I can keep up with consistency for the next 11 weeks.

I just don't feel like I have made any gains in strength. Even with the creatine in my system for almost a month. It always seems like once I up the poundage, I get scared and stall. I wait and wait to get past a certain weight but never seem to progress. This is usually when I revamp my workout routine (which also includes going back down slightly in weight - which is part of the problem). It's frustrating.

You know how EVERYTHING you read says that you shouldn't lift a weight that's too light if you are looking to challenge your muscles and gain size? Well, in a lot of exercises I am lifting a weight that I can get 10-12 reps, but when I go up a little I really struggle to get 6 or 8. I am really afraid of injuring myself also. Especially when it comes to my shoulder. I feel like I really strain when I do front or side lat raises (for instance), so I stay at the weight just below that level - yet never seem to get past it. Don't know if I should push past the strain or play it safe. Same thing happens with bicep curls, except it's not a straining feeling. It's just a feeling that I can't do very many reps without sacrificing form, unless I am at a lighter weight. But it's a weight that I just can't seem to progress past. I want to make gains DANG IT!

Also, on the negative side of things this past week, I haven't been doing my bodyweight leg lifts and lunges like I had planned. I wanted to get at least 5 days of these in. This is also a little experiment of mine. The problem always seems to be that I'm too drained of energy after my weight training (which is at about an hour already) and too tired to do them before bed like I always tell myself will happen when I skip them at workout time. Ugh. You might ask why I don't just choose one or the other but I simply can seem to bring myself to quit lifting and put all my faith that I will be bikini ready by summer, in a bodyweight routine. And I want to try getting a good burn out of high repetition lunges and lifts to see if it really does burn fat from the area like I've read about.

Despite those examples of frustration, I'm not overly caught up in them. I've still got a good attitude. And I know I have to maintain that and BELIEVE because there isn't much time left. 12 weeks of this and my body just HAS to change! It's inconceivable that nothing would come out of all that I've changed for the better - after 12 weeks of that, my body will either change or I am an unbelievable freak of nature that defies all the laws of the universe.