Update on Hanna

I feel like I have so much to do, I don't know what I'm doing blogging. But it's an addiction of sorts. I love getting my thoughts out. It's my daily therapy.

I thought I'd share quickly about my daughter, Hanna. We keep forgetting to take her measurements this week, although I don't expect to see any changes. Hanna has been in a bit of a slump lately. Actually, ever since her sleepover at a friend's house last Friday, it's been hard to get her to adhere to our regular rules. She has only worked out once this week so far, and it was so awful. She was whining and crying about how it hurt until I finally told her to just go upstairs and leave me alone. Do you know how hard it is to concentrate on a workout when you have a whiny child complaining at you the whole time? I know that is selfish of me and as her mother I should put her first but I didn't. I was in a zone, two rounds in, sweating, muscles on fire, and I didn't want to stop to lecture her [again] about how she needs to work and feel the burn if she wants any kind of progress. Once again - if it were easy, everyone would have smokin' hot bodies.

I tried to explain this while huffing and puffing through the workout but unless I stop, get in her face drill sargent style, it does no good when she is in one of those moods.

I am scared for her. I see her starting to slide back down into her comfort zone, and I'm letting her. I want her to keep progressing. I miss her old enthusiasm. Maybe she is like me and the fire that burns inside her is slower during certain weeks of the month. But even so, I need to get her back on track so she can continue to lose inches. I want to see her wear her super cute bikini that we bought her a few weeks ago WITHOUT that self conscious stance - the one where she covers her middle with her arms.

I am always telling my mom this - it is hard enough to motivate myself some days, let alone try to get another person to workout and like it. I say this to mom because she is always telling me I need to get her over to my house to walk. This is hilarious because A) she turns it into my responsibility and B) her apartment is right across the hall from a treadmill and a stationary bike. All she has to do is literally walk about 20 steps to get to it, yet she would rather drive to my house to use mine. I think it's partly because then she has an excuse (when she doesn't feel like driving over). Sorry mom. It's just that it is so hard to motivate people who are very resistant to it.

Anyway, I am hoping that when I return from my trip I can get her into the groove again. I feel that it will be a lost cause while I am away and she is with her dad. I so wanted her to go to school on that first day a changed girl. It's still a possibility, but at this point, we are sort of running out of time.