Thursday, October 13, 2011

Day 11 - two weeks clean

Yesterday was legs day. My favorite day!

I brought my 3/4 length mirror downstairs so I could watch myself squat, make sure I was getting my thighs parallel to the floor. Sometimes, it doesn't feel like I'm getting low enough. I was surprised to find that I was actually getting parallel. Maybe having the mirror helped because I could see and make sure my form was how I wanted it to be.

Last week, on my first legs day since being back to lifting, I started at 60lbs. It seemed like a light weight considering I have lifted over 100lbs before, but I had to remind myself "form over ego" and that the 100% intensity weight is coming. I made 3 sets of 12 with perfect form. However, the last few reps were challenging. This is where I start to wonder, since I made it to 12, does that mean I need to up the weight?

I don't know why I like legs day so much, as opposed to arms. It can be so tough. Arms can be tough too, I just find I sweat much easier and get my heart rate up when I lift with my legs. Obviously because they are larger muscles. But I almost get scared before squats in the same way I get scared before pull ups. Squatting is hard and it makes my muscles burn. Ironically, the burn I am afraid of is what I want to feel.

My will is still unfaltering and I don't know what snapped inside me or how I'm doing it but it's pretty much instinctual and habitual now. It's been two weeks since going completely clean. No sugar. No cheating. I feel amazing, and I think my skin really likes the change. However, I am still having issues with my gut. I wonder how long it takes to get used to this? Sometimes I forget to take my digestive enzymes but even when I do take them, I'm not quite sure they help. I'm positive it's all the protein. That's the only thing that I can think of. But I hope to get over it soon otherwise I will never be able to go out in public after dinner. I had such horrible gas last night that I went upstairs to bed at 8:30 just so I could lay down and let some of it go without poisoning my family. It's embarrassing as hell. It doesn't seem right that my body repays me with such rancid gas when I'm doing only healthful things for it! Come on!

And I have to mention something about my children that astounded me. Last weekend, I bought a box of Old Dutch rip-l chips so that I could crush them and make a coating for fried chicken (not for me, for my 'chopped' competition with my husband). They just happen to be my all time favorite naughty food. Well, that and french fries and chocolate cake. But I've said my goodbyes, it's ok. Anyway, we still have a bag left and I'm constantly reminding my kids of this fact in the hopes that they will eat them and they won't be in the cupboard anymore. They sit untouched. Last night at dinner, I brought the bag out and set it in front of them so they could eat some with their grilled cheese sandwiches. Each one of them said, "I don't want any". What??? I stood there confused and amazed and proud at the same time. Could it be?? These children of mine are actually passing up greasy salty chips for things like pears and apples? It's unbelievable. They have really changed. I haven't forced it either. The chips are still in our cupboard and I can't help but smile because I know that I'll probably end up throwing them away.

I love this lifestyle!

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