Monday, May 30, 2011

Challenge: salad

It just doesn't feel like a Monday today. But, it is and that means I need to have a plan for the coming week. I would like to try to come up with tasty salads this week. I get so bored with salad to the point where I just don't want to eat it. And I need to eat more of them, so that means I need to make them more exciting.

I love love love my food & wine magazine because there are always such inspiring dishes to try. And usually, even if there aren't many that I would be interested in trying, the wonderful photographs always make me want to try something exotic and flavorful of my own. Sometimes I think that it would be fun to be a chef. But if I cooked and baked as much as I wanted, I'd be 30 pounds heavier for sure! One of our favorite things to do on a Sunday night before bed is watch Iron Chef America. We are in awe of the creativity they possess when it comes to food. What i wouldn't give to be a judge on that show!!!

Photographing food is also fun. Although, I never make it pretty enough to be photo worthy. Wouldn't it be fun to know how to plate food to make it look sophisticated?

So, if anyone has any great salad recipes or knows of any websites containing great ideas for NON bland salads, please let me know! I'd love to turn our typical bowl of romaine, tomatoes and cucs into something that says "BAM!".

Sunday, May 29, 2011

Want a yummy recipe?

Here's a treat that you can eat and not feel guilty about it afterwards!

Click here to go to my other blog and get the recipe for healthy chocolate muffins! At only 72 calories per muffin, and no butter or sugar, how can you go wrong?!


I had some knee clicking after a run last week that had me a bit nervous so I took two days off that would otherwise have been "unplanned". Now that I no longer hear the clicking, I am back at it.

I spent Friday night at a hotel with my girls so they could swim and it was fun. The place had a fantastic fitness center that made me drool on the window as I was looking in but sadly I didn't bring any workout clothes. I never would have expected it in such a dinky place. I thought about working out in my jammies and bare feet. Just to get a chance to use some of their weight equipment. What I wouldn't give to do a real lat pulldown! I have a pullup bar and a rubber band that I use but it just isn't the same.

Sometimes I wonder if I should just join a gym. There is one not very far from our house. But the thought really scares me. It would be one of those obstacles that I would really like to overcome. I wonder if my results would be better or come faster. I have noticed that I work harder when someone is with me. Even if it's just my kids, I push myself more, I am aware of my form. It's weird.

My husband and I went to play pool last night. I had my first glass of wine in a long time. It was nice. I was hungry so we ordered appetizers. Fearing there would be nothing healthy on the menu I had given up hope when my man pointed out the vegetable platter. Amazing! Fresh cut vegetables! We ordered that and some garlic cheesy bread with marinara. I ate tons of vegetables and I even indulged in some bread. It was good.

Last week I was doing pretty good from a nutritional standpoint. I did have a few more cheats than I wanted because of Emma's birthday and our nights out. But today is another day and the start of a new week. Nothing planned in the week ahead that should devastate my results so I will forge ahead with a strong will to get some results.

Thursday, May 26, 2011


I haven't posted anything in a few days and I thought I better get after it if I want to keep the few (but awesome) readers I have =)

I know that no one reads this blog because I'm a good writer, but I'm hoping a few read because sometimes it's nice to know that other people struggle with the same things you do. And other people have the same interests as you do. And fitness is our common interest here.

It is on my mind all. the. time. I don't think 5 minutes go by where I am not thinking about my next healthy meal, my next workout, how much more fat I have to lose before I see my hamstrings, how many calories I've eaten today, etc. It's really got a hold on me. But because it is always in the back of my mind, I will be able to accomplish my goal - just not by June 1st like I had hoped.

I have made progress though, which I am excited to share with you. Despite the fact that I have had a few cheats here and there (definitely not 100% clean diet over the past month) I have lost. A quarter inch on each thigh and down to 110 pounds as of Wednesday. At my lowest, depending on where I am in my cycle, I am 111 but I haven't seen 110 on the scale in YEARS. So I have finally busted that number and I'm so happy. Even though it's not about the number on the scale, and to be honest, I would prefer it not to go down any farther. I know that to get where I want to be, I need to lose fat and my weight will go down as a result. Once I've got all the fat off (by the end of summer PLEEEZ!), I will try putting on more muscle weight.

So, what have I been doing differently to finally see some progress? Well, I guess I've really just been putting up with hunger pains. I am trying to eat less. I'm not starving myself because I know that is NOT the proper way to lose fat. But I need to get into the habit of eating less because I know that I can function on a little less than I normal take in. And it's OK to feel just a little hungry now and then. I'm not carb cycling per se, but I am really trying to limit them. For instance, I have oatmeal in the morning and then I try not to think about them the rest of the day. It's working out better than having a set schedule for when I can have them and when I can't. I guess I don't obsess over them that way. I've been filling up on protein and veg and so far so good.

I've also been training like a maniac. I thought I worked out hard enough before with my strength training 5 days a week and then a couple of HIIT sessions in between. But I figured if I want this fat loss thing to happen a little quicker (I am so impatient) I need to bump up my activity level even more. So I have been running in the evenings too. Just 30 minutes each time. Yesterday was one of my off days from strength training and I ran 30 minutes before breakfast and another 30 minutes before bed. I'm positive this will get old very fast but I am going to take advantage of my high motivation right now and burn off as much energy as I can while I still have it. I'm sure I'll burn out eventually but I'm hoping I'll have some more shrinkage in the meantime.

I love when I measure myself and I realize that I've gotten smaller because then I go into my closet and try on a bunch of stuff so I can see it. Because I can't see it when I look at my body in the mirror. I was so excited because I tried on a pair of jeans that I bought a few years ago, before we moved to Denmark, and they used to be so tight I couldn't wear them comfortably. Now, they are baggy! And some capris that I wore to the fair last summer, they were tight and I remember being so uncomfortable the whole time we were there because it was so hot and my pants were so tight. Well, I wore them yesterday and I needed a belt to keep them up!

Despite this happy news, I am still stuck with my reflection in the mirror, which haunts me as I glance over my backside and it is still a lumpy mess. Nothing is different back there. I was thinking that it was my thighs that were the problem but now I'm thinking it's my butt. Because when I measure, my thighs shrink but my butt never does.

I try to guess how much fat I think I have back there. I'll stand in front of the mirror and grab as much as I can and try to imagine how many sticks of butter I've got. Since 4 sticks of butter is a pound, I have an instant visual tool there. So as I'm grabbing my extra fat and skin I am imagining that there is about 2 sticks of fat on each side which in my mind says to me that if I could just lose 1 more pound of fat, my issues would be gone. Trouble is, I'm not going to lose it all from the area I want to lose it. But honest to God, most of it has GOT to come from there because I literally don't have any fat left on the rest of my body. Seriously. It's the honest truth. The only place I think I can spare it is my butt and thighs. Unless, of course, I lose muscle and I'm doing everything I can to ensure that doesn't happen.

I try not to think about the negatives during this happy time of loss. I need to enjoy it and pat myself on the back for a job well done, not stand there and think of how horrible it still looks back there. You know, I work REALLY hard at it. I'm not perfect, I give in to temptation and sometimes I get lazy, but I'm human and I have to expect that. Still, sometimes it doesn't seem fair that through all the sweat and soreness and hunger and just plain mental exhaustion I put myself through, I just can't get rid of that last little bit. Sigh....

It's going though, a quarter of an inch is a small amount but it's something. I'll take it. It's slow going but I will NEVER give up. Even if it's only a quarter of an inch every 3 months, eventually, I will get there.

Oh, one more thing. I know this is getting long but hang in there. I am taking so many supplements now that I think I get full before I even start eating these days! I am still taking 2 CLA capsules 3 times per day and 1 triple omega capsule 3 times per day. Now, I've got a different multi vitamin that I take 3 times per day instead of just once. Because I guess these are better absorbed by the body so you need to take them more often. And I like the idea of the nutrients I need soaking in instead of just getting peed out. Also, I am taking Schizandra and Astragalus for their benefits to the kidneys, liver and circulation. I am convinced that I have poor circulation and that could be a contributor to my lumpiness. Also, it can't hurt to try to detoxify my liver and kidneys a bit. At this point, I need to try everything I possibly can to aid me. I should be getting the nutrients I need for natural detoxification but I want to make sure I fill in any gaps. As long as it's a natural supplement, I don't see any problem.

The little things will add up.....

Sunday, May 22, 2011

What are striations?

I had a nice rest day yesterday. My hammies were sore, and still are today. I love that this same workout that I've been on for nearly 4 weeks (exactly 4 weeks after the next 3 workouts) still makes me sore! Today I am back at it. Gonna punish thighs.

You know, I've posted some of my progress pictures on my bodyspace at and I am amazed at the compliments I have gotten. I don't feel that I deserve it actually. I guess I don't always see in myself what others do. There were a couple comments on the striations on my shoulders and chest.

I had to ask myself....what the heck is a striation??? I'd never heard of that term before.

Following definition from
Striations are the tiny grooves of muscle across major muscle groups in a highly defined body. Having striations mean you can see the stretching of the muscle sort of like steel cables or stretched plastic wrap.

Hmmm....that's pretty cool!

If you care at all, you'll get some results. If you care enough, you'll get incredible results.

Friday, May 20, 2011

happy friday

Got caught without spinach today (oh no!) so I had to make my post workout shake with bell peppers. It's quite good. I used 1 yellow and 1 red pepper. Little chunky, but good.

Go my workout done this morning and I'm looking forward to a total rest day tomorrow. AND, a trip to Space Aliens at the request of my soon to be 5 year old, Emma. I plan on having a big burger, fries and a chocolate shake! So excited. I'll be gulping down water like a camel afterwards too because of all the salt.

I'm noticing that my bottle of CLA is almost empty. Time to buy another one. I've already gone thru a bottle of triple omega and am on a second one. Trying to think when I started.....almost a month ago maybe? I'll have to think on that. But I've faithfully taken 6 CLA and 3 triple omega supplements each day for quite a while. This is pretty good for me because I hate swallowing pills and I usually have an awful time remembering to take even my vitamin! That in itself is quite the accomplishment.

I haven't noticed any changes in body composition since taking the CLA but I know that it is something that I'll probably have to be on for a good 6 months before I can tell a difference. I'm trying out something new.....patience. ;)

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Run? Sure!

My little E bear did so awesome on her mile run tonight. And I can't believe how quick it went. I could easily have gone 20 more, I swear. I was totally pumped! Maybe it was because I was with her and she is just such a great girl. And I was really trying hard to get her mind off being nervous.

She saw an ambulance there and she was so worried about it. I told her that there usually is an ambulance or two when there is an event with a large crowd, just in case someone gets hurt or faints, or....

"Why would someone faint? Do you think someone will get hurt?" ...and on and on

I mean, she was really nervous. She is my little worrier. I guess she gets that from me. But we made it through without any panic attacks. And I am so proud of her. She accomplished something new and is looking forward to going again next year, with little sister Emma in tow =)

As for me, I'm really liking all this extra exercise I'm getting lately. I think maybe I need to keep running in the evenings because it is doing wonders for my mood and stress level. As long I can do it outside. Indoors on a treadmill definitely doesn't have the same effect! Could just be the fact that I am out enjoying the nice weather after a loooooong cold winter and not a very nice start to spring. Whatever it is, I like it!

Just think of all the extra calories I'll burn! Working out twice a day.....whoo hoo! Not sure how long it will last but I'm just going to go with it.

I am a bore

I've got this feeling lately that my posts are getting quite repetitive and boring. I don't really do anything new and I'm not in the middle of some awful attempt at fast fat squashing so there really isn't anything to blog about.

The last two nights, I've been outside jogging with my 8 year old. She is running the mile youth run tonight and I am running with her. She is a bit apprehensive because she doesn't know what to expect but I know she will have fun. The only bugger is she still has this horrible cough and one of the worst stuffed up snotty noses ever! Poor thing, her nose is so red and raw from tissue. But still, she charges on. That's my girl!!

Once again, when Eden and I got back home, I went out again. With my dog this time. Although now that I think about it, I probably shouldn't have taken her this soon after her surgery. She did ok. Not great. She still tries to lunge at people and other dogs. Andreas thought maybe once she was running she wouldn't, but not the case unfortunately. That's alright though. I don't mind going out myself. It has felt so great to be outside in the sun, getting sweaty. I just hope I don't get burnt out working out hard in the morning and then running at night. But now that the weather is supposed to turn rainy again starting tomorrow, I suppose I'll be done running until the sun shines again.

The Fargo marathon is this Saturday. Hopefully the rain will hold off but it's not looking good. According to our meteorologist, it's supposed to dump on us that morning. Yuk! But those runners get into such a zone that it won't phase them for the most part. I want to wish my sister Sue and her friend Mary good luck on their first ever 10k (50 and fabulous - go ladies!!). And also good luck to my friend Carmen (aka runnergirl) on her first ever full marathon. Although, she is such a machine, she doesn't need luck. She will rock it for sure! Have FUN and enjoy it!

I got pumped just walking in the dome to pick up my daughter's youth run packet, the vibe is so exciting!! It's a big commitment to train for one of those events and sometimes it can feel like a pain in the ass (I am only speaking from my past 1/2 marathon training) but when it's race day, it's all worth it. And THAT is what you train for. Have a blast runners!

Wednesday, May 18, 2011

First outdoor jog of 2011

Last night, I took my 8 year old, Eden, out for a jog. She is running a youth mile run tomorrow night and she wanted to get a couple practices in before hand. She did amazing, like I knew she would. And last night was an amazing night (after another amazing day). Beautiful outside. Perfect temperature in my opinion. It was so enjoyable, in fact, that after we got back home, I grabbed my iPod and went out again for a longer run. It was peaceful and lovely. I was in SUCH a great mood the rest of the evening. It really did me good. If you read this blog, you probably know that running is not my preferred workout. I wouldn't like it if I HAD to do it. But when it's like it was last night, on a whim ... an "I feel like jogging outside because it's so beautiful" kind of thing, that's when it's enjoyable.

Here's an interesting quote:

"True or False:
If you want to lose fat quickly the best thing to do is to run for miles and miles and miles.
False. That’s great if you want a pancake butt, loose skin, shin splints and a lower back so sore that you can’t wear your favorite high heals!

Don’t get me wrong, running is great for burning calories but you can get your fat down to 15% with just diet and weight training alone. You don’t need cardio until that LAST few percent." - Flavia Del Monte

Ugh, does that mean I have to run now??

Today, my butt workout is up in the rotation. That isn't so bad. It's the shoulders and the abs that are the two main killers. I was so tired this morning that I didn't get up for fasted HIIT. In fact, after breakfast, I went back to bed because it was actually hard to remain in an upright position. I was SO tired. I think that the lack of sleep the night before has caught up with me. It's hard to sleep when you have a sick little one in your bed coughing all night long. Poor little girl :(

Not sure if I mentioned this or not but I won't be doing the 10k this year as planned because I kept forgetting to register and when I did finally try, it was full. Only the full marathon was still open (no thanks). Oh, and the 5k but it's kinda like...what's the point? The only reason I was going to run in anything was because my sister is running it. The one who never thought she'd run. I am so proud of her! She has the bug because now she is talking about wanting to do a relay next year. And so I suppose I'll get sucked in...haha.

But I will always stay true to my weight bench. You are my number 1 =) And I think I hear you calling.....

Monday, May 16, 2011


Did my ab circuit this morning right after I woke up, before eating. I just got done and I'm sweating like a pig. Yay me!

Sheesh, the things I do so that I can eat full fat ice cream.

Sunday, May 15, 2011

Ready for a rant?

This has been on my mind for a while and I just want to voice an opinion about it. The topic? Pills, potions, diet aids, fat burners, juices and the like. I've used some in the past. Have they helped me reach my goals? Absolutely not.

Everybody wants to believe there is something out there that will deliver fast and easy fat loss. I've certainly been guilty of it. We are drawn into the advertising that promises to solve our weight problems with little to no effort on our part. "DRINK THIS" "TAKE THIS PILL" "EAT THIS MIRACLE BERRY" and that's all you need to do. Continue to live your lifestyle of poor nutrition choices and don't bother breaking a sweat exercising because we've found a miracle in a bottle! And we believe it! Because we want to. Sometimes we are so frustrated with dieting the wrong way that we feel like we have to try everything that is out there. And so we spend more and more money on crap that doesn't work. When all we really need is good old fashioned hard work.

Do you really believe that the flawless model on the infomercial or magazine ad actually got the body she has from whatever she is endorsing? you think she got paid lots of $$$$ to be a model and sell a product? I'm going to go with the latter.

Why should we spend so much money needlessly on stuff that is supposed to be SO GOOD for us when all we really need to do is go to our local grocery store, buy fresh produce and prepare it ourselves. Whoa.....prepare it ourselves? That's just too much work.

But wouldn't it be cool if we could just swallow some magic juju and POOF! fat loss? Sure! It would be awesome as hell! But, there IS NO SUCH JUJU! Come on, people. Stop wasting your money. Just pick up some dumbbells, sweat and workout hard most days, eat right and save money. It IS work. Sorry. But if you want it, you have to WORK and EARN it!!

And what about people who use said products and claim it's the best thing ever and has helped them immensely, and it does the laundry too? Well, I say....placebo effect. If you believe strongly enough that eating chocolate morning noon and night will help you lose weight, it probably will. Power of the mind. Because if something were really (I mean really) that effective, it would work for everyone.

'nuf said

Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go kick my own ass in my "gym" and then drink a spinach smoothie. You magic juju swallowers come see me in 6 months and we will compare body fat, okie dokie? ;)

Saturday, May 14, 2011

Rest day

I typically welcome my one rest day each week with open arms, but sometimes it can be a mental struggle. Especially when I don't really have anything in particular planned so I'm free to roam the house wondering what to do. I might think to myself that I should do something that resembles exercise. But I have to remind myself that it's just as important to give my body the rest it needs, as it is to train it. As long as I can get some active rest, like a walk or maybe a little playtime with the kids, it's not so bad. It's all about keeping busy.

I have been longing to go for walks outside in the warm spring air. The only problem is, we aren't having much warm spring air this year. This entire week has been grey and rainy and cold. Very cold actually. Last year at this time my irises were all blooming and we were enjoying the sunshine in shorts and sundresses. Now, my irises are barely out of the ground! I want to move out of this area so bad. And I feel guilty about it too because I was the one who desperately wanted to move back. But I was an ocean away from my family and missed them terribly. Now I'm thinking, life is just to short to stay in an area where you don't feel like you can enjoy being outdoors. Being someone who likes being active, going for bike rides or hikes, picnics, etc., living in a decent climate is pretty important.

My dream location would be somewhere tropical. A house on the beach with palm trees and a view. Isn't that everyone's dream? I like to watch HGTV when they show House Hunter's International. Last night they were looking on the Seychelles and I tell you what, that looks like the most beautiful place on earth with the perfect climate. I could definitely see myself happy there! I love that show but watching those people living my dream while I wither away in this prehistoric lake bed, is quite depressing.

But, since I'm in good old North Dakota, I can enjoy what I came back for....being with my family. And tonight, I plan on having sushi with my sister and mother at our favorite place. And because it will be my "cheat" for the week, I don't have to feel guilty about the white rice. I might even have a glass of wine!

Happy Saturday!

Friday, May 13, 2011

successful week!

I am so happy with myself this week. While I may not notice a change in the mirror or my measurements, I feel good about my accomplishments this week.

Here's why:

My workout plan was to do circuits 1-5 on M-F since I skipped Sunday (it was Mother's Day afterall).
Also, I wanted to incorporate morning fasted HIIT most days, and so far I've done 4 days this week.
I wanted to make sure I didn't do too much sitting. Stay active.
Eat clean. No slip ups or cheats.
And make sure I'm eating lots of veggies.

This is a reason to be happy.

I'm 2 and 1/2 weeks into my new circuit workout routine and I'm loving it still. It's tough but I can already tell that I'm handling it better, I'm getting more conditioned each time I do it. I still sweat like a pig and huff and puff the whole time, but that it's what I needed. I think before, training with heavy sets, I felt like I was working out hard but I wasn't sweating near enough. I sure am working up a good sweat these days!

Tomorrow, I am treating myself to my first "cheat" of the week. I am going out for sushi with my sister and mom. I am going to try and keep the cheat to just that meal but I know there are some chips in the cupboard calling my name ;) Maybe I'll buy triscuits and cure my salt craving with those instead.

Great week!

Thursday, May 12, 2011

hanging on

Morning fasted HIIT again. Whoo hoo, look at me go!

I'm not deathly sore from my ab circuit, big improvement from last week. My butt cheeks are feeling like themselves again. It's a good day!

Soon I'll be off to hit the weight room again. Shoulders is the focus today. Sigh.....
Another tough workout. Pull ups....

I used to cringe at the thought of push ups. Now, they are like eating cake. Ok, not quite that good. But when it comes to push ups, all I have to say is BRING IT! I want to say that about pull ups one of these days.

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

Report for Tuesday

No morning HIIT for me today. I was exhausted this morning. I have a sick child who was up at 5:00 and then my husband woke me at 7:00 when he left for work (which is early for him). I was dreaming when he woke me and it is NOT typical for me to still be asleep at 7:00.

I never used to be a morning person. I guess having children forces you to become one. But I love it.

Anyway, I am still planning on getting HIIT in but I will do it 3 hours after dinner, so around 8pm. Also, I think I have my butt workout today. That's ok, it's one of the easier ones I think. My abs are a little sore today but not nearly as bad as last week. My buns still hurt from Monday though so the butt workout should be interesting ;)

Diet has been clean and good so far this week. I haven't been keeping meticulous track of calories but if I don't see any change after this week (providing I can continue being a good girl through Sunday), I might have to start keeping track. But I don't think I've gone overboard on anything. I tried keeping my carbs limited to 2 per day but that isn't working for me. I've ramped up my workout load so I need more fuel. Now, I'm happy if I keep it to 3. I think yesterday it was 4 but oh well. I ran around the yard chasing the dog with the kids last night so I'm sure I burned it off ;)

Tuesday, May 10, 2011

New pictures

Not sure if I see any difference in my upper body lately but I am DEFINITELY loving the way it looks!! I feel strong and I love having definition in my arms. I can wear tank tops with pride!

I love the bicep vein! To me it represents hard work, leanness and muscle!

Would love the bicep to be a bit bigger still. I will work on that after summer ;) I also need to work on my booty. Lift it lift it lift it!!!

Yet another angle. I like my arms. Now if only I could confidently display my lower half. Give me another 10 weeks, y'all!

Abs don't change much anymore either. That is another spot I am pretty lean. I'm no apple! But a total pear. All my fat sits on my butt and thighs at the moment. While most people consider visible abs a great sign of a fit and lean physique, I just desperately want leaner legs and built hamstrings!

"Persistence is the iron quality of success; if you persist long enough you must eventually succeed."

"Of course it's hard. It's supposed to be hard. If it were easy, everybody would do it. Hard is what makes it great."


Yesterday went well. Diet and workouts. Both a success. I thought about fasting yesterday to undo all the terrible food I ate Sunday but I didn't. I just ate clean and kept my calories down. I think I was around 1300 calories (which is 700 below my maintenance) and I felt really full. That was nice.

Today is the second day in a row I've done fasted intervals (done by 7am) and I feel really good about it. Afterwards I wait an hour to eat (to really get that fat burning effect) and then after I eat breakfast, I wait 30 minutes to an hour and then do weight training circuits. Today the focus is on abs. I really cringe when that days comes around in the rotation because it KILLS me. Not only is it tough but for the next two days I will be in pain. Yesterday the focus was thighs but my butt is what is most sore. I'll take it!

So how did I do with my weekly goals yesterday?
1) got my fasted intervals in
2) got my circuits done
3) went for a walk
4) ate clean
5) didn't stress
6) could have moved more during the day though

Not bad. Let's see if I can be that successful again today!

I like having a more relaxed attitude. I know that some people can really get into a zone when it's crunch time but that intense low carb cycling really whacked out my hormones. It's a big stresser and that is just not the way I want to do things. Will I try it again? Probably. I know, I'm a glutton for punishment. But I am who I am.

Monday, May 9, 2011

New week

Last week was a disaster in terms of following my carb/calorie cycling plan. I'm going to give myself time to refocus and try it again later this month.

Plan for this week:
1) eat a clean diet M-F
2) have one treat Saturday & Sunday
3) move more
4) morning fasted intervals (only 10 minutes but intense)
5) nightly fast paced walk 30 minutes after dinner
6) and of course, my same circuit training workouts

but most importantly:
7) don't stress about it so much!

I read something that sounded like it was speaking directly to me last night in terms of dieting and working out:

"stop trying so hard"

I had mentioned something about that in one of my last posts. To me, it seems like I do try so very hard and seem to have little to show for all my efforts except that I'm more stressed out. It's the stress caused by my insane expectations for myself that are probably to blame for my stalled progress.

So I'm going to try a different approach. I'm going to [try] to have a more relaxed attitude about this. It's not like I am competing in something. There is no time limit to this. Even though I have a deadline for June 1st, I just wanted to have the best body I could by that date. And I will. I will have my best body [since I was a teenager] so that in itself is a success. And it just keeps getting better all the time. It's cumulative.

At my goal deadline I wanted to be able to wear my bikini with confidence. But confidence comes from within. It's the way you chose to carry yourself. Maybe I need to work a little harder on the inside instead of the outside.

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Day 6 of 14

Today was a rest day, so no workout to report on. We started out for a bike ride, all five of us, which I was super excited about, but it hit a snag. We bought this tag-a-long which is like a bike with only one wheel that you hook to the back of another bike so a child who is too big for a bike seat can ride with you. I have a 5 year old (in a couple weeks) so it is perfect. But we didn't get very far before having problems with it. For some reason when I would hit a bump, the tire would lock up. We are scratching our heads trying to figure this out. I guess we'll have to call the 800 number to see if they can help.

Anyway, diet started out great. It was just the hubs and I (kids spent the night at grandma's) so we decided to go out for breakfast together....alone! I ordered 2 eggs, 2 whites, plain oatmeal and cottage cheese. I was such a good girl. Lunchtime, I made a picnic for the girls and I had an Ezekiel english muffin with natural peanut butter and some nonfat plain Greek yogurt. Then, I had my chocolate protein powder and spinach shake like I do every day. And at dinner time, I made hamburgers. I was good, had to small pattys without a bun (as planned) and oodles of cherry tomatoes. But here's where it takes a turn for the worst......

I made crinkle cut fries for the kiddies because it's Saturday and I wanted to treat them. My husband made chocolate shakes (ice cream and chocolate sauce). I made the mistake of tasting it. OMG - it was SOOOOO good. And of course I had to dunk some fries in it.

Ok ok, I can live with that. But then, we had all these chips in the pantry for our Mother's Day BBQ (the whole family is coming over) and I opened a bag of kettle cooked chips and had a bowl. Right before bed too. UGH! Can you see me sliding downhill?

I don't know why I do this to myself. See, it just goes to show that if it's in the house, you know it's there and crave it hardcore. I honestly don't know how I ever made it 3 months without ANYTHING naughty....that was an incredible thing. Right now, I still eat mostly clean with a slip up now and then, and I can live with that. But is that going to bring my results to a screeching halt? I know that by taking it slow and persevering, doing the clean eating during the week and having one treat meal Saturday and Sunday will work. Eventually. But I wanted quick. Quick does not mean easy. Oh this is stressful.

So what now? I'm pretty sure I've screwed up my entire week now (since I had tortilla chips also this week for cinco de mayo). And tomorrow morning, I'll take my measurements and there will be no change so I'll crumple on the floor in a blubbery snotty mess because I feel like I try SO HARD and I have SO MUCH determination and it's ALL I EVER think about and yet.....I just can't get there. It's just not fair. Are a couple slip ups now and then really the reason I can get rid of my thigh fat?

Well, I'm finished with the pity party. Like always, I will get back up and try again.
"Fall seven times, stand up eight."

I just don't know if I should try the carb cycling thing again or if I should just go back to standard clean eating. Because carb cycling is so stressful for me that I think I set myself up to fail every time I do it. If I just eat clean and healthy, carbs and all, at least I'm satisfied and don't feel cravings. Maybe it's the stress that doesn't do me any favors. I should just try and eliminate all the stress I can and see if that helps. Maybe I try too hard?

Anyway, happy mother's day to all you fabulous mothers out there! Have a great day.

Friday, May 6, 2011

day 5 of 14

I turned yesterday into a high carb day (remember the tortilla chips?) so today was a low day. 2 days low, 1 day high (repeat) I think is a more sustainable option for me me anyway. We'll see. It's trial and error like everything else.

But, I had MUCH more energy today. I got through my workout with energy to spare. And I haven't eaten a whole lot today. It's already almost 4pm and I'm not really hungry despite only eating 3 times so far today.

I was just outside with the kids blowing bubbles and it's hot out there! I love it! I'm wearing my dark skinny jeans and I think I need to switch to shorts (even though that though still scares me). By the way, my skinny jeans are sagging ;)

I am really looking forward to my weigh in and measurements on Monday morning. I excited and scared. I'm excited to see if there are any positive changes happening yet and scared that there might not be. I'm trying hard not to think like that though.

Tonight I am going with my husband to a bar. And I'm not planning on drinking anything other than water. I don't even want to. Funny how much a body goal can change your habits - for the better!

Thursday, May 5, 2011

day 4 of 14 (evening)

I celebrated Cinco de Mayo with my family. I made it fun. I put up decorations and made fajitas. Yummy healthy fajitas that weren't on my planned menu. But when I made my menu, I forgot about Cinco de Mayo. Oops. But that's life.

Oh, and I had tortilla chips. It was wonderful. I'm dealing with the guilt. I guess I'll get on the treadmill at a ridiculous incline for about an hour now :(

"When you feel like giving up, remember why you held on for so long in the first place."

Day 4 of 14

As I blogged about yesterday, the no carb day really hit me hard yesterday. So much that I had to add a serving in for 2 of my meals. After, I felt more like myself. NO diet is worth feeling that way no matter how good or how brief. So, for the remainder of my two weeks, I will still be cycling carbs, I will just add one serving to breakfast and one serving to lunch on my low days. That way, I'm only adding an extra 140 calories (approx.) per day and it will still keep my low calorie days low. I'm expecting great things!

Also, I just wanted to clarify that I typically am against any sort of fast diet or crash diet or low carb diet or anything of that nature. I am on a "diet" right now but I know that I'm not negatively affecting my metabolism. By bringing my calories up every 3rd day, I avoid the "starvation response" - in which the body holds onto fat. Being on a low calorie diet for an extended period of time, or taking in too few calories for your body's needs will make your metabolism slow and sluggish. My "diet" is only 2 weeks and by cycling those calorie intakes, I can safely keep my calorie levels lower than normal. By adding a few carbs to the low days, I could potentially keep this up for 12 weeks if I needed to. I don't want to think too far ahead though. I'm just taking it one day at a time and I will judge what has to be done once these two weeks are up.

Today, my workout was hard. It started good but I petered out fast the second half. I had to end my last circuit with 2 sets left because I was just exhausted. That is due to where I am in my cycle (day 15). Around days 14 & 15 I am usually crabbier, more tired and hungry anyway. That also contributed to my low energy yesterday as well. It's nice to really know your body so that when you have those days where you just feel a little off, you know why. Then you are less likely to freak out about it, knowing it's only a few days until you feel normal again. I used to beat myself up for this sort of thing before I knew how big of a part my hormones played in this game. Now, I can move on without guilt.

This is a beautiful day and I'm sure I will be spending some time outside soaking up the sun and going for walks...a great way to burn a little extra calories! I hope you all have a marvelous day!

Wednesday, May 4, 2011

day 3 of 14 (afternoon)

Really struggling today. I'm feeling quite weak and I just had my "lunch" at almost 2pm. It was 1 cup of fat free cottage cheese, 1 tbsp coconut oil and cherry tomatoes and cucumber. I'm still hungry and I can't wait for dinner at 5pm because I'm making sirloin steak with broccoli and cauliflower. I'm hoping that will give me the strength I'm going to need for my HIIT session this evening.

I'm really going to try and get past just one more low day (tomorrow) because it's really important to get past the first hump. One day at a time. Then Friday I can celebrate the first low phase done with a delicious starchy carb with every meal ;) One more more more day...

I have a ridiculously energy taxing workout tomorrow morning so I pray I have the strength to make it through.

This is NOT fun. But it's only 2 weeks. Just think about the results you will get in 2 weeks, Charlotte!

day 3 of 14 (morning)

This morning I woke up hungry. No, not hungry, ravenous! I was literally shaking and felt like I could pass out while I made my eggs. Also, I didn't wait until 8am to eat, I started my eggs as soon as I woke up, which was a little before 7am. After my eggs, I was still shaky and lightheaded so I had a small bowl of shredded wheat & bran. I know that type of carb is not technically allowed today but I needed it. I have to be able to function, I can't be a wobbly starving heap of low energy goo for the next 12 days. I've got a family to take care of!

In the past, with the carb cycling I've done, I've had carbs like that even on low days, just kept it to the a.m. meals, so I don't count on it being a setback. I'm still forging ahead, as planned.

My abs are still incredibly sore. I'm SO GLAD that today is a rest day (except for HIIT). I really need it!

Tuesday, May 3, 2011

how day number 2 went

Overall: good

It was about 1:00 and I was shopping with my mom and started to feel lightheaded. But I survived it without passing out and ate when I got home at my scheduled time (2:00pm).

Circuit training went good this morning also, it was sort of an easier day compared to the others. Except that my abs hurt SO BAD still. I sneezed earlier and thought I was going to rip in half. Tomorrow, I get a break from circuits and just have HIIT. So that is something to look forward to I guess.

Here's exactly what I've eaten the last 2 days:

MONDAY (high calorie/carb day)
8am = 1 egg, 4 whites, 1 c. grapefruit juice
11am (p.w.) = myoplex w/ spinach, banana, sprouted grain toast
2pm = 1/2 c. oats, 1/2 c. greek yogurt, 2 c. broccoli/cauliflower
5pm = ground turkey w/ bell peppers and brown rice
8pm = small salad
cla & triple omega 3 times
calories = 1335

TUESDAY (low calorie/carb day)
8am= 1 egg, 4 whites, 1 c. grapefruit juice
11am (p.w.) = myoplex w/ spinach
2pm = 1 c. greek yogurt, 1 c. broccoli/cauliflower, 1 tbsp coconut oil
5pm = halibut, 1 c. asparagus, 1 tsp. safflower oil
cla & triple omega 3 times
calories = 1160

I think on my next high day I need to go a tad higher. Otherwise the calories seem too close for one to be considered high and the other low.

My energy seems a little on the low side right now but I was pretty active all day today and yesterday. It could be because my abs hurt so bad all I want to do is not move ;)

I definitely think I can handle this for 12 more days. I can do anything for 14 days, right? I am just focused on the results. I want to wake up on the 15th day and see improvement. 

questions answered

Amanda, thanks for the comment. I will give you an answer.

I did actually take some pictures of myself yesterday. Sadly, they seem to look exactly the same as the other "before" pictures I have taken. But at some point, I will have done what I've set out to do, which is to lose my pear shape. And whether that is 1 month from now, 3 months from now or 6 months from now, I promise I will post the before and after pictures. But there has to be an "after" picture in order to do that. And it won't be classified as an after picture until I have reached my goal. Then, I will also be able to share exactly how I was able to achieve my success. I closely document everything I do, so that part will be easy ;)

Right now, I am on a specific fat loss program and I have to give myself at least 6 weeks to see some picture worthy results. Anything sooner than that would be unrealistic. Because it didn't just take my thighs a couple of weeks to get flabby, I can't expect it to only take a couple of weeks to get rid of the flab.

My two week deadline is a way to drop my body fat percentage. I am expecting to see a change in my measurements but I'm not sure if I'll be able to see visible changes in the way my thighs look after 2 weeks. But I sure hope so! My theory is that the reason my outer thighs look so lumpy is because the fat that accumulates there hangs down, creating "cellulite". If I can just get rid of the fat that lingers there, I'm positive the lumpiness will be gone too. Like I said before, if I give myself about 6 weeks with these intense circuits I'm doing, I can expect to see some noticeable changes within that time frame.

So how is my training now different from what I've done in the past? Basically, you need to get your heart rate up to lose fat.  During the past week, I have definitely gotten my heart rate up! These circuits are kicking my ass! My weight training routine is usually about building muscle. But right now I'm going to be in a calorie deficit which means I won't be able to build muscle. So the focus now is strictly on fat loss.

It's hard work. I know it. I know all you readers know it. If it were easy, we'd all have smoking hot bodies right now, wouldn't we? Truth is, we need to sacrifice and we need to put in the time and effort and sweat to see change. And it doesn't happen overnight. But it will happen with perseverance and determination.

The fact that I write down everything and analyze my results from week to week ensures that eventually I will succeed. Because I have a way of knowing what works and what doesn't. If I don't see changes from the past week, I just look at my journal and tweak something. True, sometimes I get lazy and just maintain. But I'm on a time crunch now! I need to step it up.

As far as the calorie cycling goes, here's what I am doing for the next two weeks: 1 day higher carb/higher calorie followed by 3 days lower carb/lower calories. Repeat. For me, I've chosen 1500cal/1000 cal. On paper, this should help me shed around 3 to 3 1/2 pounds of fat after the 2 weeks are up. And since I'm pretty lean everywhere but my lower half, the fat should mostly come from my thighs and butt.

I've done this before, and it's hard as hell. This time, it's even harder because I'm taking my carbs WAY down on low days. The only carbs are veggies. But another difference is, I've planned ahead. I've planned out every single meal that I will eat for the next 7 days and written it up and put it in my kitchen. I don't have to wonder what I'm eating or when. This way I've taken out the guesswork and set myself up for success. After 7 days, I'll do up my menu again for the next 7 days. Then, on the 15th day, I'm going to eat some kettle cooked potato chips ;)

If this goes well and I do shed fat but see that I still haven't totally rid myself of the main problem, I plan on taking a week or two off from cycling and then hit it again for 2 weeks. I reeeeeeally hope it doesn't come down to that but if it's necessary, I will do it.

Thank you so much for the positive feedback and encouragement! I know I only have two followers on this blog but you girls are a great support system and I am lucky to have you. Thanks for listening to my rants and for helping me through this!

Day 2 of 14

Well, the first day of the fat torching diet I am on for the next 2 weeks went very well. I had a ton of energy and was really motivated. I hope it lasts. But I am sure that even by the end of the first week it will be getting very hard to stick to.

I did an hour of training (well 49 minutes to be exact) in the a.m. and then a HIIT session in the evening. Yay me!

The goal for the week is 8000 calories. My maintenance level is 14000 calories so you can see that I am spreading out 4 days worth of calories over 7 days. Plus, I am working out [hard] for 5 days with weights and including 3 HIIT days and a couple steady walking days.

Yesterday I punished (and I mean punished) my abs. Today I am in pain (again) and praying I get through my workout!

Diet yesterday went well. How could it not? I had everything all planned out! Dinner was awesome, even the family liked it. Although, my husband is still not sold on ground turkey. Last night while he was examining the meat on his plate he asked, "Is this chicken?" and I said that it was turkey. So he said, "So there IS room for improvement." and winked at me. Bless him for trying.

I still have to figure them out but I'm pretty sure my nutrient ratios were right on the money and yesterday was a "high" day, which means 1500 calories, and I am pretty sure I was within that range. Today will be the true test, and the next two days after. Because then it's only 1000 calories and NO carbs except for veggies! Oh boy. I'm back with nutrient breakdowns from yesterday:

calories = 1335
fat = 19.5
protein = 98.2
carbs = 145.6
fiber = 21.5

I don't think I would ever get it 100% perfect but it was very close. Calories were even under 1500 (1300 is probably closer to what I should use as a high day anyway)
Fat was a little low.
Protein is pretty much spot on.
Carbs were a little low.
70 oz of water.
But overall I am happy with those numbers.

Monday, May 2, 2011

Day 1 of 14

I woke up ready. SO ready. More ready than ever. More motivated than ever. This month is going to kick my butt! Good. I'm counting on it.

So, like I said, I've got my menu for the week hanging in my kitchen. Every. Single. Meal. For 7 days. There is no question what to eat. Or when.

Just finished one of the hardest workouts I've ever done. OMG! Average time to complete it: 1 hour. My time: 49 minutes. I am so sweaty right now. I feel SO GOOD! I still am in awe at how tough these new workouts are. I'm still sore and I don't even know from which workout anymore! Been sore since last Wednesday. All I have to say is that if June 1st rolls around and this hasn't worked...nothing will!

30 days to go!

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Ready. Set. Go!

Well, I spent the evening creating my menu for the entire week. Every single meal of every day written out on paper. Then, I made a corresponding menu for the family and I got my shopping list written out and grocery shopping done. Actually, shopping at 8pm on a Sunday night was quite a nice time to go. The store was so empty!

Anyway, I've got a solid plan in place so there is no question what to eat or when. Having a plan is vital for success. I've also written out all my planned workouts. Even the time of day to do them. I've scheduled them in. This fat is going to leave my body!! I am SO stoked!

I'm prepared. I'm ready. I've got a challenge ahead of me but with my plan in place, I will succeed. It's a short time - 2 weeks. I can do this!

I CAN'T WAIT to strut my lean toned body this summer =)

Plans for this week

Horrible cheat day out of the way. Yuck! Moving on...

Plans/goals for this week are as follows:

1) Tomorrow, I will indeed start my 2 week fat torching "diet". Basically it will consist of carb/calorie cycling. But this time, it's way more intense than any cycling I've done before. The only carbs I get on low days, will be from veggies. I have a feeling I will be slightly cranky for the next 2 weeks. BUT, there is only 31 days until my goal now. I have GOT to do this. And I have got to do it perfectly. I can do anything for just 2 weeks. I'll need all the support I can get! *hint hint*

2) Keep up with the circuit training 5 days/week. Add HIIT to 3 days. Add a steady pace walk to 2 days. AND, I hope to have the energy to jump on the mini tramp a couple of times also. I know that is a lot to shoot for but, I need to kick it up a notch. No, 10 notches.

3) Keep my sanity. This is important. Over the next two weeks I will be prone to crabbiness, shortness with my kids and asking myself "why am I doing this". But I need to spend each day quietly reflecting the reason I need to take it to this drastic level. I absolutely KNOW this is going to work, I just have to DO it! If someone were to hand me a guarantee that I would absolutely lose fat from my thighs within the next 2 weeks and this is all I had to do, I would do it and it wouldn't seem so bad! Well, no one is handing it to me personally but that is basically what is going to happen. I will drop body fat and I will lose it from the areas where it hangs on for dear life. And it will happen in just a couple short weeks. Those last pounds of fat will leave my body and I will have achieved my goal BY GOAL DATE! And I will be happy. Sure beats months of trial and error and guessing and hoping and working like a hamster in a wheel. Just 2 weeks!