Am I dark? Or just dehydrated....

Ok, so reading over my last post, I discovered how dark and depressing it got towards the end. I seem to constantly be trying to convince myself of a good enough reason to keep on going with a more rigid diet and exercise plan than average people probably adhere to. It's become so routine and most of the time I actually do enjoy it. I don't know why I have to convince myself that it's ok. Maybe because so many people try to tell me that it's not. "You're too thin. You work out too hard. You don't enjoy life. You are obsessed." - I've heard it all...and often.

I think I've been in a funk. The constant clouds are a factor, as is a little bout of fatigue I've been dealing with. Quite possibly I've had a bug of some sort. My mom thinks I was dehydrated and the more I think about it, the more that could have been the case. To the best of my knowledge, I've never been severly dehydrated before so I don't know what it feels like or what the symptoms are. But my mom used to be a nurse, so I figured she knows what she's talking about.

I've been sluggish, tired, weak, nauseous and I was starting to think it had something to do with all the vitamins I take. (And no, I'm not preggers) I know that it is possible to take too much of a good thing, and certain vitamins don't just get peed out. If you have too much of them in your system, they can be toxic. I probably get most of the nutrients I need just from the food I eat, I take a multi vitamin as assurance to fill in any gaps. But then I also take other supplements for this and that: circulation, joint health, liver and kidney health, heart health, water retention, etc. And sometimes, I wonder if all that is safe in combination. The funny thing is, I am exercising and eating right to avoid having to take pills for conditions later in life that I could have prevented, but now I am taking tons of capsules daily anyway....for prevention and health. So it goes....

But I've also been drinking tons of tea and exercising quite hard, which is what lead my mom to believe I might have gotten dehydrated. I'm starting to feel better, not nauseous or super tired but I am not 100% yet. Working out is still a struggle. I had to quit a little early the last couple of times and today I struggled to get through it all. I'm trying to keep my water intake high and I've cut back to 2-3 cups of tea a day. I hope to be out of my funk by the weekend.

Saturday is my 6 year wedding anniversary. I can't believe how fast time has gone since being married to Andreas. It is my second marriage. My older two girls are from a previous marriage, which only lasted 3 years. That's a whole other story. Many many stories actually. Some of them really dark. I am a completely different person than I was back then. I am a better person. And I owe it all to Andreas. We are planning on going out to dinner at one of our favorite Italian restaurants: Grazzies. Italian food is truly a weakness of mine and so I am low-carbing it for the 3 days prior. Then, I can feast guilt free ;)